(no subject)

So, my friend Joel stopped by my place of work to say hello, tonight, out of the blue. He's one of the funniest people I know, but he may well also be in the running for most puzzling person I know. Several months ago, he was commenting on how we needed to hook up before I moved. I've always been attracted to him, so I said: "Sounds good to me. We're both single at the moment. How 'bout a date?" He says: "Absolutely!" We call back and forth a few times, set up a day, then he gets sick and can't make it. Any attempts at scheduling another night when we're both off is thwarted, then I suggest: "Well, how 'bout you come up here to hang out with me, one night when you're off? We'll order pizza and watch a movie or something." The couple of times he did pop by he couldn't stay but for a few minutes. So, I figured he hadn't really meant it. It seems like a reasonable assumption, doesn't it...? So, a couple months ago, I hear he's got a girl and I send him an email touching base and congratulating him on finding someone. I hear nothing back, and then he pops up tonight, and the first words out of his mouth are: "How are you I love you Please tell me you still want me." And the conversation doesn't turn from lust and how great I look the entire fifteen minutes he stays to hang out (as is often the case when he stops by to see me). Which would be dandy if he weren't still with the girl and monogamous. I really don't understand the point of talking so much talk if one never really intended to walk the walk. Is it weird, or is it just me?

So, this leaves me sitting here feeling vaguely jerked around and depressed, and knowing in my heart of hearts that--while I don't see myself getting into a serious relationship with anyone anytime soon, and hadn't been banking on anything serious with him--when I do commit myself to someone, it's going to be someone who means what s/he says. Life is too bloody short to be constantly having to figure out whether a person's being serious or bullshitting.